i told my mum

BUT I HAVEN'T TOLD YOU?

Sorry for not mentioning it to you BUT there is an ever so slight possibility that I will see Pete Doherty this summer in France. You see, he will be playing in Lyon during July 26th, which is one day before my camp ends. So, since my mother will probably have to go to Lyon anyways due to work, i MIIIGHT be able to go.
if i go... AHHHHHHH my knees give out just thinking of it.

champion

the best photograph taken of chloe sevigny.
EVUHH

su-rreal

i simply cannot believe i will be in paris in a about a month! it is a strange, strange little feeling. anywho, summer has started out oddly enough as well. today, all i have been doing is watching the Blogotheque's take away show on youtube. i have stumbled upon some brilliant bands and artists, and my ears have become flooded with all the sounds they have made. Using this blog as a medium, i will employ free advertising!
here is a list of the artists i have found and become infatuated with

1. federico aubele
2. grizzly bear
3. sidi ali
4. stephen malkmus
5. and more, more, more! but those above stand out

well, now i'm off to continue this quest for good beatz to fill my ears this summer, and HOPE HOPE HOPE that stumble upon a Take Away show whilst in the parisian streets.

NO MORE TETE CONTRE LE MUR!

I AM FREE!
it's a real shame that the font size can't be larger.
but YES, i am freed from the shackles of private high school education!
and i will not miss those polyester pants, not one bit!
i have sold many, many of my used books, and I have received about $170, which is perfect because I have a lovely little cart full of things in urbanoutfitters just waiting to be bought and worn in paris!
really.
once again.. i will show you my cart then on account of I don't want to drag on about my dull adolescent life.. and material objects are just so much better.. naturally

• these lovely sunglasses, i am infatuated! also.. i lack any sort of protection from the sun for my eyes, i lost my other sunglasses on the cruise
• yes, i will perhaps look like Lolita, but this romper is so damn dreamy. the pastel blue, ahh!
• i need, need, need these high-waisted black shorts. so practical!
• this to wear to some event or another.. bahh, it looks nice and backless-ish
• then when the sunglasses above look strange with the outfit, these black ones will do just perfectly
• are they not TO DIE FOR? these oxford shoes are lovely.. specially since i own no black flats that aren't ripped to shreds.
  

So yes, i basically do need all these things,no exaggeration! haha.
I mostly need the shoes though.. because as attractive and waifishly cool as the Oliver Twist look may be, it's no fun when it rains.. and you step in a puddle.

le fleurs du mal

I cannot, i simply cannot any longer! Tomorrow is my last final, Alg. II, which I should be studying so hard for on account of i have an F, yes.. an F, in that class. But i have reached a point of indifference. I'm with Madison at Cecilamor's house amidst a sea of used tissue paper and the smell of tea tree oil. In one of our many "commercial breaks", as my math teacher likes to call them (brief moments of distraction often abruptly ended by someone going "okay, okay we have to work"), we began to talk about absinthe for some reason. In the Romantic spirit, my eyes basically twinkled. I suddenly got the urge to stand up, hop on cecilamor's car (WHICH I HAVE BEEN LEARNING HOW TO DRIVE IN shhh), drive to the airport, and catch the first plane to Paris. Once there, i will rent out a cheap flat and invite pete doherty, we would drink absinthe in teacups and read Baudelaire and Rimbaud to eachother. How i long to bond over Rimbaud with a fellow LiberTeen! Then, peter and i could to to the nearest café, and indulge in the fine pleasure that is wine, cigarettes, and exotic cheeses.
I MUST STOP!
I am salivating.. i swear.

Alright, so i am off to my house now to not* study algebra, but instead.. pass out and dream of the hedonism to come...

ahhhhh

i want to be a fellini whore

That's my dream and aspiration.

Suicide in the Trenches

by: Siegfried Sassoon

I knew a simple soldier boy
who grinned at life in empty joy
slept soundly through the lonesome dark
and whistled early with the lark

in winter trenches, cowed and glum
with crumps, and lice, and lack of rum
he put a bullet through his brain
and no one spoke of him again

you smug-faced crowds with kindling eye
who cheer at soldier lads walk by
go home and pray you'll never know
the hell where youth and laughter go

quiero que me quieraaaas

Yesterday was eclectic. Somewhat.. I got out of my Spanish final, which i just so happen to believe that i ACED, the essay was on romanticism.. i mean, come on! and yes, i did constantly mention Rimbaud and Wilde. anywho, after, i lusted over this boy who left my school a while back and is very, very politically correct. so dreamy. then, lorena and i went to stephie's house and we made some macaroni and cheese and watched sex and the city. hahah.. i know. but it was awfully entertaining, besides, BARYSHNIKOV was on it! i never thought i would find myself lusting over a 61 year old man.. but there i was. at 12:54, lorena and i had to run back to school for an AP US History meeting i was to have, and got there right on time. so, we had the meeting, and at two-ish we went to the cinema to watch some films with our friend francisco. we got there and found fran wandering aimlessly about, bought the tickets, and ran in to see Rudo y Cursi. then, we went into the café section, i had some smoked salmon and toast, with the works, and we went back in to watch Les Ambitieux, which i thought was absolutely incredible. it vaguely reminded me of one who starred that man from Delicatessen, who's name eludes me at the moment.. Dominique? and Fanny Ardant. So good!
there's one boy in the film 'mathieu', played by this french actor called Renan Carteaux, who has the best jawline i have ever laid eyes on. truly, my knees gave out when i saw his profile.

oh, the picture above is me and my friends maria and gino, when we went to the cinema several months back, i think.

i fookin hate america.

soiffard- drunkard
la mise en bouche- appetizer
un nuage de fumée- a cloud of smoke
un nuage de lait- drop of milk (in coffee)
passer sa vie dans ses pantoufles- said about someone who lives secludedly
raisonner comme un pantoufle- to reason foolishly
velléité- vague desire, impulse, whim
faire moitié moitié- to go havsies
rester scotché- to be flabbergasted, stunned
vexer- to hurt, object
sourire- a smile
la façon de vivre- way of life
têtu- obstinate, headstrong, stubborn
une tasse à café- coffee cup
prise de bec- an altercation, an argument
guérir- to cure, to make better

wordz in french for you to know. i'm on da phone with allyssa now. tomorrow i'm going to the cinema and watch Rudo y Cursi and after some french film..

Parce que je suis un enfant terrible!

Only one month and several days until Paris, and naturally, the research has once again begun. I've found several promising places to go whenever i want to quench my (not so) inner LIBERTEEN. as you can tell by the painting, i found several places where absinthe is available. and since i will be turning the legal age of drinking in paris this summer, then i shall go for it! also, i found this small and quaint hookah bar near the Lycee which i shall become a regular of, of course. I found the best take-outs, best places to eat macaroons, best independent movie houses, best thai food in paris, best tea, etc etc etc..
anywho, i was scouraging through my photobucket account just now, and i found out that before my scenexcore stage, and even before my zomgz im so hardcore with The Used and Chiodos, i used to listen to pete doherty and of montreal nonstop. my latent cool kid. 2 YEARS AGO! i am shocked.

sexual deprivation at its finest.

It is simply not healthy to watch over and over again excerpts of films regarding mexican homoerotica and french incest. It simply isn't! I've seen the Ma Mere trailer over three times, and that one scene from Y Tu Mamá También, and let me tell you.. my hormones are in shambles. i just feel like reading Lady Chatterly's Lover and sobbing at my lack of a sex life. Which, for some, is alright being that i am fifteen years old. But let me tell you, times have changed! All the baby-boomers should start worrying. PARENTS! in our parties, we all drink to an excess, probably involve ourselves in recreational drugs, and enjoy sticking out tongues down other's throats. This, at times, may exempt me, especially the last part on account of when my social life went down the drain, so did my ability to attract those of the opposite sex. besides the tubby ones.


anywho,

i just want to get to paris already, and act excruciatingly adolescent, have someone breakthrough my hymen, and drink excess wine. you know why?

COS IMA LIBERTEEN

acquire some culture, will you?

Stanisław Ignacy Witkiewicz

Dramatist, novelist, philosopher, art theorist, poet, painter and photography.
you can tell i like him because of his excess well-rounded-ness.
The thing that first attracted me to him, oddlly enough, was his suicide, which i'll gracefully allow wikipedia to sum it up for you

"Shortly after Poland was invaded by Nazi Germany in September of 1939, he escaped with his young lover to eastern Poland. Following the Soviet invasion of Poland on September 17,1939 , Witkacy committed suicide. Witkiewicz lied to his lover, saying that he would give her poison while he was to cut his veins. However, he had not given her poison, but himself took Veronal and slit his wrists. She woke up later to find him dead."

the reason I stumbled upon this man was because I was doing some research for my screenplay, so i had to look up a list of famous artists/poets/authors/singers, and all the like, who had killed themselves.. and i found him. i fancy his drawings, and his photographs are alright, but i long to read his novels

you can read your watchmen and batman..

BUT TINTIN AND ASTERIX WERE WHERE IT'S AT.
And i've just uncovered via IMDB that they are making a film of Tintin. Starring Jamie Bell, Simon Pegg, and Daniel Craig. Safe to say, i am simply dying to watch it.

p-p-poundit.

I frankly just feel like being amidst hundreds of sweaty parisians dancing with strobe lights?
or, you know, a basement with sweaty teenagers will do..

i wish i was 14 again

but this time residing in Edinburgh, and named Diane, naturally.
boyz who resemble mark renton.. ma hymen is yo's

marauding on a typhus flu

Today has been a good day. My english teacher let me know I got a 96% on my research paper, which I will eventually post, infamously titled Why America is Afraid of Nipples. Also, I think I did wonderfully on my chemistry exam thanks to newfound knowledge regarding technology and such. My film test today I do believe I aced as well. I AM ON A ROLL. Ever since i finished my AP class and now have an extra 45 minutes after snack to do as I please, i have felt loads better.(besides my little fit this morning in the car, but i won't bore you) Well, next weekend is the Puerto Rican Indie Music Festival which may come out to be interesting, on account of Madison miight come and it will be in Aguadilla, which I've never been to before. I know, i know! This post must sound very dull. No literary language nor clever remarks whatsoever! I do apologize, but I am somewhat in a mental vegetable state because of all that's happened this week. BAH.

anyways, the photograph above is one that I saw on some fellow's myspace and my heart turned to mush. so fucking lovely. i only wish I knew the photographer, damn!
ALSO, the boy on the far right looks just like the boy i've been lusting over since my mother opened Richart conveniently next to his home. He rides a unicycle, for christsake. If that's not a sex symbol, I don't know what is!

i know the ending

now to come up with a middle would be awfully lovely, really.

synopsizz.

Friends since they were forcefully pushed out into the real world, fresh out of high school, Matthew, a ripe, young Breton who smokes cheap cigarettes and curses the day the Queen was born just to piss off his parents; and Philippe, a native to Paris, who has written a verse for every woman he’s ever known and refuses to sit at the back of a cinema because he wants to witness the images first. This time, at the rim of the Pont Neuf, Philippe, though clad in darker colours, attempts to serve as Matthew’s beacon of light. A beacon of pompous, hedonistic, and ever-criticizing light. As they tower over the Parisian waterway, they try to convince each other that they are both doing the right thing, whether it be jumping off a bridge, or simply living.

and now SHIT i have to write the treatment for it. yet i've no idea how it will end.
lovely, really

EUPHORIC TIMEZ

OH, I'VE ONLY THE BEST NEWZ EVUHH

Animal Collective, YES, ANIMAL COLLECTIVE will be playing a gig in Paris on July 16th. I will be in paris then. Also, that is the day right before my birthday, and if it all goes as planned, i will be amidst the parisians and incredible when it strikes 12 o'clock, my birthday. there are some very, very promising people who will be in the oxbridge camp as well who shall come with me. i am so so so so so so so SO stoked, it's mad. so july, will you please hurry up and come?

MY DADDY WUZ A BANK ROBBAH, BUT HE NEVUH HURT NOBAAHDY

So, I finally finished watching RocknRolla yesterday, and I was pleasantly satisfied with it. In fact, I am not afraid to say that it was pretty bloody brilliant. I mean, it's you typical Guy Ritchie film, along the lines of Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch, but, let me tell you, i am a newfound Ritchie fan. The dialogue is deeper than many would expect from a "gangster" film, but it's even philosophic and just damn witty.

Johnny Quid: All you need to know about life is retained in those four walls. You will notice that one of your personalities is seduced by the illusions of grandeur - the gold packet of king size with a regal insignia, an attractive implication towards grandeur and wealth, the subtle suggestion that cigarettes are indeed your royal and loyal friends, and that, Pete, is a lie. Your other personality is trying to draw your attention to the flip side of the discussion, written in boring bold black and white, it's a statement that these neat little soldiers of death and in fact trying to kill you and that, Pete, is the truth. Oh, beauty is a beguiling call to death and i'm addicted to the sweet pitch of its siren. That that starts sweet ends bitter, and that which starts bitter ends sweet. That is why you and i love the drugs and that is also why I cannot give that painting back. now please, pass me a light.

See, what did I tell you? Brilliant. Anywho, I'm awfully stoked that Ritchie is in production of Sherlock Holmes, starring Robert Downey Jr. which i have always been sickly infatuated with. It's those small facial gestures, I tell you!
Well, i must go, I have an AP Exam to study for and a cardiac arrest to go in because of that. Ehrm.

toodlez

mccarren pawk pool

GEORGE CRAIG. you are wonderfully precious. also, you look like a british Andrew Vanwyngarden

pass over the keyz to the chastity belt

You can break through my hymen, if you'd like.

AHH BRITISH YOUTH DRIVEZ ME MAAAD

gothic churches and excess frizz

...And what a day it's been today. This morning, at 9 I was at school, beginning our Mock AP Psychology Test, with my head aching and my stomach growling. I got an 80 in multiple choice, and was not able to finish my essays. Hopefully, i got a 4. HOPEFULLY! After that, my friend Carolina was to take madison and me to go eat at this place called Alive. She eventually left without us, so we were then forced to walk to Richart, leaving behind a trail of sweat because of the damn Puerto Rican heat. We were then driven to Gusto d'Italia, one of madison's uhmazing restaurants (free advertizing, what?!) and ate until we could no longer. The risotto tasted wonderful. When we got out, it was pouring rain, and of course, because all has to always work in my favour, i had gotten my hair straightened out the day before. Great. So, no one could drive us to the cinema, so I had to somewhat wrap my cardigan around my head, and walk there. We had to walk the longest bridge in Old San Juan, essentially, and it was rusty and slippery and not sturdy at all. We shat our pants, naturally. When we finally got to the cinema, soaking wet with the top of my head about three inches higher because of the excess humidity, we bought two tickets for Sunshine Cleaning, and went into the room. There was absolutely no one there. Not one person. NOT ONE! And there was something wrong with the projector, so the image was moving in the most frightening way. Madison almost went into cardiac arrest. The film begun, and so did my depression. I mean, it was alright, but damn, what horrible lives they lead. Though the boy could not have been more precious! So after, we walked outside. Of course, the sun was shining brighter than ever. The day was beautiful. Madison saw some flowers she liked that were wrapped around a gate, and she pulled out a scissor from her bag (?!) and cut it off.

ZOMGZ, JUVINILE DELINQUENT

Then I showed her this wonderfully small Gothic church that I am simply infatuated with. We were going to walk inside, but they were conducting some sort of ceremony which involved chanting and other strange, strange things, so we remained outside. Then, my father came to pick us up. We fought in the car. Got to richart. And i saw a trailer to a film I want to watch very badly. Then i heard the best news ever, and the reason for the picture above..

POLAROIDS ARE (in the process of being) SAVED!!

So, essentially, I'm in euphoria now. And strangely in the mood to watch a horrible, yet entertaining mainstream film. Ghost of Girlfriends Past? SURE. it's gonna be.. ehrm, quality stuff. But i really feel like not thinking today because i'm exhausted. simply exhausted!

cape cod kwassa kwassa

So apparently there's been a huge mystery regarding these sharks, called Basking sharks (2nd largest fish next to whales) and their whereabouts during wintertime. No one had ever seen a pregnant female. No one had ever seen a newborn. They had no idea where they disappeared to during wintertime, but now they know. Thanks to researcher Greg Skomal, I live in fear. He and a team of researchers tagged 25 of these beasts, which they found off the coast of Cape Cod (sorry ezra, but it looks like I won't be going there anytime soon), and tracked them down during winter. Many of them ended up in places like the coast of Brazil, the Sargasso Sea, and the FUCKING PUERTO RICAN TRENCH. Which means, they some of those were practically close to my home. I live in front of the beach. GREAT, REALLY.
Thankfully, it is not a shark that tears limbs or anything of the Attila the Hun sort, it is a harmless filter feeder.

Also, it's cartilege is used in traditional Chinese medicine, and Japanese aphrodisiacs. Just thought you might like to know.

I know this post is utterly pointless, but hey, you learn something new everyday, hm? So go off and flaunt your newfound knowledge on basking sharks, you pseudo-Jacques Cousteau! Your welcome..

fuck ms. ffoliot-ffoulkes!

This is how attractive I must be to have gotten only considered for that part. I ask you, readers, when you read me, would you think: a snobby, british woman in her sixties?
That was the only female role that did not have the characteristic of having to be "attractive". Coincidentally, this is the only female role I was considered for.
YEAH SELF ESTEEM!
So, i'm stuck being backstage, once again. Student director, which is good I reckon. but come on, it was AGATHA CHRISTIE! she would appreciate me. i think.
anyways, not feeling too chipper today, but on the bright side.. my spanish sitcom is on in less than an hour?
That's all that I can think of really, on account of this saturday i have an AP Psych mock test. Then on tuesday, the test itself. Horrible! I am perfectly stressed out.

RODIN, MORCEAU DE MERDE!

The spirit of Camille will live on!
On that topic, wherever did Giganto go after Victor Hugo passed away? Such a face is never forgotten.